“How many times have people used a pen or paintbrush because they couldn’t pull the trigger?” – Virginia Woolf Today, I’m using the pen in order not to pull the trigger, at least, the verbal trigger on my husband. We’ve talked for a while now about getting a second dog. When we married, I had … More who’s failing whom?
is not a good one. my mind itches, and I just want to be left alone. but there are people everywhere, and they all want something from me. I’m wearing a mask, and no one can tell.
I’m restless, and he’s watching me, and he said something earlier I’m 90% sure I took the wrong way, and he apologized profusely, and I know it’s just my brain twisting things around, but I’m still restless. Unsettled. I don’t feel like I’m a good wife or mom, but I feel like all I do … More Who knows what to call this?
all these people are making my skin itch. go. home.
is being underwater disconnected from everything and everyone wondering where the joy in your life has disappeared to. is watching one of your favorite comedians and having one-tenth of your brain think the joke is funny but the other nine-tenths not being able to work up enough emotion to care. is dreading having to back … More Depression
Today, in the car. We are on the way home from Mother’s where Kidlet has been with Nana while I ran to a doctor’s appointment and Target. I am a different Mommy than this morning. This morning, I was nervous about being late even though there was ample time. It didn’t feel like ample time. … More Me…and Her
we had a fight, and now everything is too loud and bright and I just want to sleep. When he left to go to the funeral home and help his momma make arrangements, we’d just decided to tell Kidlet tonight. He comes home and all of a sudden, because she’d had a bad experience at … More Grief?
my friend’s husband died today. My other friend lost her battle with breast cancer yesterday. What is this??
there is no dignity in dying. Wishing I could find whoever told me that bullshit and beat him with several rolls of quarters. I hate watching him suffer. God, if you love him, if you love us, won’t you please take him home??
they are putting him in hospice. The icu Doctor says he’s done all he can. Want to feel angry? Try and understand the fairness of your mother-in-law facing widowhood. I’m so mad at God right now. Just, why? no comments, please. I don’t want any esoteric, theological, well-meaning explanations about His priorities, or plans, or … More ?
Chock Full of Verbalness 